Latest Scare: A planet we can’t see is going to appear out of nowhere and collide with us this month

According to a Christian numerologist, we’ve all got one week to get our affairs in order before the .

, who’s theories are not endorsed by any church or denomination, claims that a planet called “” or “” is on a collision course with earth and will be here to wipe us all out on Sept. 23.

That’s right. A planet no one has heard of, that we can’t see is within striking distance of the Earth at this very moment, and yet it doesn’t appear in the night sky. We can see Pluto and stars in other solar systems, but there’s an entire planet on it’s way here to wipe us out. It’s just going to show up on Saturday.

Theories about this mystery planet have been around for a while, and it conspiracy theorists placed it at center stage in 2012. The world didn’t end that year either, but no matter how wrong conspiracy theorists are and how many times science and time prove them wrong, they still shun the common sense that their tinfoil hats are blocking out.

For its part, NASA has repeatedly denied the existence of Planet X, but what do they know about space, the universe and new planets? In a world with no experts, lunatics abound. So, no matter how many times actual experts deny a fringe theory, no matter what evidence they give or — in this case — no matter how many times they point to the sky and scream, “if a planet were that close you’d see it by now,” the uninformed and uneducated among us will still stick to some absurd theory they read on the Internet.

Meade, of course, has written a book on the subject and would be more than happy to sell you a copy before the imminent demise of this planet. Incidentally, Meade doesn’t seem to actually think the world will be ending on Saturday, jut that the planet’s close proximity to Earth will cause a chain of events, starting with a miraculous sign over Jerusalem and some volcanoes that will usher in the 7-year tribulation period prophesied in Revelation. It will be interesting to see how he walks this back once nothing unusual appears above Jerusalem.

And what of the other name that Planet X is commonly known by, Nibiru? As it turns out, Nibiru is the name associated with a known planet. It was the name ancient Mesopotamians ascribed to the planet we now know as . In case you were wondering, ’s orbit is not on a collision course with Earth.

Of course, there’s always a chance that the majority opinion is wrong and our science is flawed. If we get obliterated by a rogue planet next weekend, this blog post will look pretty stupid. Of course, nobody will know the difference at that point, so I’m not all that worried about being wrong.

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